Ceremony in Place of Kaddish: 5/2/2020

עֲקַבְיָא בֶן מַהֲלַלְאֵל אוֹמֵר, הִסְתַּכֵּל בִּשְׁלשָׁה דְבָרִים וְאִי אַתָּה בָא לִידֵי עֲבֵרָה. דַּע מֵאַיִן בָּאתָ, וּלְאָן אַתָּה הוֹלֵךְ, וְלִפְנֵי מִי אַתָּה עָתִיד לִתֵּן דִּין וְחֶשְׁבּוֹן. מֵאַיִן בָּאתָ, מִטִּפָּה סְרוּחָה, וּלְאָן אַתָּה הוֹלֵךְ, לִמְקוֹם עָפָר רִמָּה וְתוֹלֵעָה. וְלִפְנֵי מִי אַתָּה עָתִיד לִתֵּן דִּין וְחֶשְׁבּוֹן, לִפְנֵי מֶלֶךְ מַלְכֵי הַמְּלָכִים הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא:

Akabyah ben Mahalalel said: look at three things and you will not come into the power of sin: Know from where you come, and where you are going, and before whom you are destined to give an account and reckoning. From where do you come? From a putrid drop. Where are you going? To a place of dust, of worm and of maggot. Before whom you are destined to give an account and reckoning? Before the King of the kings of kings, the Holy One, blessed be he.

***

This mishna encourages us (to put it lightly!) to remain humble. Three things can bring one to haughtiness. The first is one’s spiritual state, when one sees oneself as spiritually superior to another. I would include here someone who was born into a well respected family, who views themselves as loftier due to their “pedigree.” 

A second is one’s financial status. We see this all of the time. Someone strikes it rich and they no longer have time for the “simple folk” anymore. But it can also be subtler: one gains more wealth and forgets to be nice to people as now they view themselves on a different level. 

Finally, one can see themselves as more important due to their achievements. A good example of this is the professor in Good Will Hunting (one of my favorite movies). He was distinguished in his profession, with awards and all. This led him to view himself as more important than others, including Robin Williams’ character (poor Robin!). In the end, it was Will who humbled the professor and showed him there are people smarter and more accomplished than he was (if you didn’t see it, sorry for the spoiler…). 

We shouldn’t wait for a young genius like Will to help us grow in humility. Akabya ben Mahalalel is telling us to proactively take things into our hands, to “look” at three things that can help us. In relation to our spiritual pursuits and “pedigree,” he reminds us that our life and spirituality started from a single drop of life; we are all equal in this sense. With regards to our financial status, we aren’t going to leave the world with any of it. We are all destined to enter “a place of dust.” This is also an equalizing thought. 

Lastly, even our accomplishments are judged not in relation to others, but in relation to ourselves (“before whom you are destined…”). This is the idea of G-d’s account and reckoning. We each stand as individuals in front of Hashem and give a reckoning in relation to what we achieved with our own unique skill set and talents. This should protect us from comparing ourselves to others and, in turn, lead to humility.

“Look at three things”
 

Visualization is a powerful tool. There are texts which talk about visualizing Jerusalem as we pray. The mystics talk about visualizing light or names of Hashem as we engage in meditative practices. Akabya ben Mahalalel talks about visualizing where we came from and where we are going. Perhaps he would even suggest visualizing what the “final account” will be with Hashem. 

At the Seder we are asked to “see ourselves” as if we left Egypt. Maybe this should be understood simply: envision what it might  have looked and felt like to leave Egypt. I think it may be a good idea these days to do something similar. Envision yourself on the other end of this whole COVID-19 experience. What are you doing? How have you grown from it all? Which lessons are you implementing from this “locked down” experience? 

You could also envision those future times just to uplift your spirits, if needed, during these days. Am Yisrael has been through a lot and has always pulled through. We have survived plagues, Pharaohs, tyrants, pogroms and so much more. G-d willing, we are going to pull through this, also. Picture what it might look like for you and your family on the other side. 

רַבִּי חֲנִינָא סְגַן הַכֹּהֲנִים אוֹמֵר, הֱוֵי מִתְפַּלֵּל בִּשְׁלוֹמָהּ שֶׁל מַלְכוּת, שֶׁאִלְמָלֵא מוֹרָאָהּ, אִישׁ אֶת רֵעֵהוּ חַיִּים בְּלָעוֹ.
 

Rabbi Hanina, the vice-high priest said: pray for the welfare of the government, for were it not for the fear it inspires, every man would swallow his neighbor alive. 

***

We recite a prayer in shul each week called Prayer for the Welfare of the Government (Koren Sacks Siddur p. 521). It may have been instituted based on Rabbi Hanina’s teaching. 

As for the content of the mishna, Rabbeinu Yonah (13th century) has an awesome teaching:

“This matter is wanting to say that a person should pray for the peace of the whole world and be in pain about the pain of others. And this is the way of the righteous ones, as David, peace be upon him, stated (Psalms 35:13), ‘As for me, when they were ill, my dress was sackcloth, I afflicted myself in fasting.’ As a person should not make his supplications and his requests for his needs alone, but rather pray for all people, that they be at peace. When the government is in good welfare, there is peace in the world.”

Judaism has always been a universal religion with its vision set to the rectification of the  world. True, there are many texts which indicate otherwise, with a more national and exclusionary tilt, but Prof. Alan Brill has already pointed out that this is only one of four strands in our tradition when it comes to our attitude toward other nations (see Judaism and Other Religions: Models of Understanding). 
 

We have access to Rabbi Kook’s (1865-1935) personal journal entries. They were compiled into a short book in Hebrew called Hadarav. I translated some of the entries into English here. In this collection, several passages are dedicated to his overflowing love for the whole world. This is the message of our mishna according to Rabbeinu Yonah. We should care about and pray for peace of the world. 

Here are two of Rabbi Kook’s entries on the topic: 

✾ I love everything! I cannot withhold my love from all of the creations בריות, for all the nations. In the depths of my soul I wish for the splendor of everything, the rectification of all. My love for Israel is more passionate and deeper, but the inner desire, in its overpowering love, extends to everything ממש. I feel no need to squelch this loving feeling. It emanates directly from the holy depths of the wisdom of the divine soul. (p. 167)

✾ I love all of creation הבריות! Under no circumstances will I change this internal trait of mine. And I find meritorious aspects and positive sides in everything—in everything ממש! (p. 163) 

All of us, “all of creation,” are in this together. We should not only be worried about our community’s welfare, but about those suffering in other parts of the country and the world as well. Of course, there is an order, as Rav Kook notes and as is delineated in our tradition: “the poor of your own community take precedence” (BTalmud Baba Metzia 71a). This goes for the Jewish community as a whole in relation to other global “communities.” Nevertheless, when it comes to helping others and giving charity to those who are suffering during this pandemic, we should keep the “welfare of the world” in mind and take proactive measures toward helping those outside of our immediate (Jewish) circle as well. 

We are all children of one God as is taught in Malachi: “Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Why should we betray, each one his brother, to profane the covenant of our forefather?” (Malachi 2, 10) We must pray for each other’s welfare so we can all emerge from this trying reality even stronger than before.
 

רַבִּי חֲנִינָא בֶן תְּרַדְיוֹן אוֹמֵר, שְׁנַיִם שֶׁיּוֹשְׁבִין וְאֵין בֵּינֵיהֶן דִּבְרֵי תוֹרָה, הֲרֵי זֶה מוֹשַׁב לֵצִים, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (תהלים א) וּבְמוֹשַׁב לֵצִים לֹא יָשָׁב. אֲבָל שְׁנַיִם שֶׁיּוֹשְׁבִין וְיֵשׁ בֵּינֵיהֶם דִּבְרֵי תוֹרָה, שְׁכִינָה שְׁרוּיָה בֵינֵיהֶם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (מלאכי ג) אָז נִדְבְּרוּ יִרְאֵי יְיָ אִישׁ אֶל רֵעֵהוּ וַיַּקְשֵׁב יְיָ וַיִּשְׁמָע וַיִּכָּתֵב סֵפֶר זִכָּרוֹן לְפָנָיו לְיִרְאֵי יְיָ וּלְחֹשְׁבֵי שְׁמוֹ. אֵין לִי אֶלָּא שְׁנַיִם, מִנַּיִן שֶׁאֲפִלּוּ אֶחָד שֶׁיּוֹשֵׁב וְעוֹסֵק בַּתּוֹרָה, שֶׁהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא קוֹבֵעַ לוֹ שָׂכָר, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (איכה ג) יֵשֵׁב בָּדָד וְיִדֹּם כִּי נָטַל עָלָיו:

R. Hananiah ben Teradion said: if two sit together and there are no words of Torah [spoken] between them, then this is a session of scorners, as it is said: “nor sat he in the seat of the scornful…[rather, the teaching of the Lord is his delight]” (Psalms 1:1); but if two sit together and there are words of Torah [spoken] between them, then the Shekhinah abides among them, as it is said: “then they that feared the Lord spoke one with another; and the Lord hearkened and heard, and a book of remembrance was written before Him, for them that feared the Lord and that thought upon His name” (Malachi 3:16).
 

Now I have no [scriptural proof for the presence of the Shekhinah] except [among] two, how [do we know] that even one who sits and studies Torah the Holy One, blessed be He, fixes his reward? As it is said: “though he sit alone and [meditate] in stillness, yet he takes [a reward] unto himself” (Lamentations 3:28).

***

What is wrong with two people sitting together and not exchanging words of Torah?

The mishna is careful to note that the two individuals in our mishna are sitting together, but are not exchanging words of Torah. Perhaps they were both learning on their own, but there was no exchange of ideas.
 

Nothing is wrong with learning on one’s own. However, without feedback from others, one can easily miss details and err in judgement. This is the secret to chevruta learning in yeshiva (learning in pairs). 

I am very careful to have people review my sermons prior to their delivery. I always gain important tips and pick up on errors through this form of peer review. This may be why the verse, while referencing two who learn together, mentions their words being written in a “book of remembrance before Hashem.” After one’s words have been shared with another, reviewed, and scrutinized, they are then worthy of being “published” in Hashem’s book of remembrance.

Another way to understand the first part of the mishna is to see the two who are sitting together as two people “hanging out,” but not engaged in spiritual pursuits (even on their own). “Hanging out” and enjoying each others’ company is fine. The mishna is reminding us, however, that it’s also important to find ways to grow spiritually, to add vitality and life to the discussion through a connection to Torah. This is the origin of the custom to deliver a dvar Torah at a meal.
 

It’s important to find ways to elevate our mundane affairs, especially during these days. Many of us are at home all day. In this reality there is a tendency to be overly involved in “home things”: opening and closing the fridge (and then opening and closing it once more…); watching shows; reading or watching the news; phone calls, Zoom, and live chats with family and friends; sitting around on the couch. The real challenge is breaking free from this mold a bit and incorporating some Torah or holiness. It is sometimes easier to do so when we have a set class which we attend in person or when we are outside the comfort of our homes. 

What’s vital to remember in these times is the conclusion of the first part of the mishna: that the Shechina resides among those who share Torah. When we infuse our days with holiness, we inject into them a dose of life and vitality, which can help us in all of our affairs. I remember when I was working really hard on my academic work at Bar Ilan University. At that time, I used to attend an early minyan, at sunrise. I recall how much life that minyan gave me. I felt it literally pushed me through the first part of the day and helped me study and write better.
 

The word Shechina comes from the root שכן which means to reside. When we tap into our life force, the Torah and mitzvot, we are infused with closeness to God and, in turn, divine life. This can really pick us up and transform our day. 

I was chatting with someone the other day about all of  the vitamins they take each morning. They shared about their vitamin C and B12 intake, and about a few more. I then asked them if they took their vitamin G that morning. They looked at me with a puzzled look, until I explained: “That stands for G-d. Did you find a moment to consume, among all of your other important vitamins, the one that can give you spiritual nourishment and energy? They glanced at me with a smile and laughed at my joke (but I actually was serious!).

3. Tzedakah:
We abstain from giving tzedakah on Shabbat