Journal from Ashkelon

In order to understand I need to see. In order to believe I need to experience.

January 15, 2009 MASA [the organization that oversees student Israel programs] invited anyone from Baltimore to attend a program hosted by our sister city, Ashkelon. Because of the war in Gaza this program was modified in order to keep us safe and let us experience what it was like to be in Ashkelon during this time. Instead of a sit down dinner where we could meet different families residing there, the 13 of us were split up into two bomb shelters where we played with kids for the day. That day made me wake up. When the war broke out and started to escalate I half-heartedly supported Israel. Sure they needed to protect their citizens but at what cost should the other side have to pay? That's the argument of the other side. Then I lived a day as a person in Ashkelon does. Just one day. And now I understand because I saw and I believe because I have experienced.

There must have been at least 50 kids in that bomb shelter that day. There were probably six high schoolers watching them. They do this because schools are closed and they have no where else to go. During our initial meeting we were told that every kid in Ashkelon does something to help. What else is there to do when your school is canceled because it might be bombed? While there, the six of us from Baltimore got to know the kids. I started off with a young boy named Ben who was putting the final touches of a smiley face on his balloon using feathers, stickers, and pompoms. Of course he only spoke Hebrew but I learned from him that he was 6 yrs old and has two older sisters. After he was done he ran off to show one of the counselors his colorful creation. Next I sat next to Sivan who was so extraordinarily shy that her neighbor had to explain to me that she doesn't speak to anyone. Instead I bonded with her through stickers, no speaking. Sticker after sticker I handed her in the hopes that I would get one word out of her. After her balloon was covered in a wide variety of smiley face stickers she jumped off her chair. As I said goodbye she turned back and said todah (thanks). That was it but it meant a lot to me. I moved then to another part of the bomb shelter where there was music and general mayhem. These poor teens who have to keep these kids from boredom were trying to teach them a dance. A couple of us joined along and danced with these kids who were reluctant at first but soon became eager to join in the fun. There was a moment though when I saw a little girl starting to get upset. One of the counselors had a little boy on his shoulders but could not possibly put her there too. Instead he turned to me and signaled to me if I could do it. Why not? I immediately put her up there and found that, even though she wanted to be up there, she was probably not a great fan of heights. Her hands were wrapped around my eyes making me blind most of the time but she did not care. She was just up there, hanging around, getting some special attention that I bet a lot of these kids don't receive that often. I never learned her name. The final time I spent there was in another part of the bomb shelter making puzzles with kids. The first part was to color in a Disney coloring sheet that was attached to cardboard. If they wanted to, one of us from Baltimore would cut it into puzzle pieces for them to take home. Let me just say my Hebrew is not highly developed yet. I can speak to a bus driver or explain to people why I am in Israel but a conversation, now that's hard. With those kids though, I could do it. It didn't matter that I did not understand everything they were saying and they had no clue what I was trying to tell them (even when I said it in Hebrew). All I had to do was smile and act silly. That's it. The rest came naturally to me. We discussed where the Disney princesses live and if they have ever visited Israel. We argued over what color the dress should be for Cinderella, and we debated which princess was the most beautiful. It was amazing. And at that moment, I connected with one girl specifically. She was a cute little girl around 5 yrs old wearing a pink shirt. She wouldn't let go of my hand. Not until she pulled me over to meet her older sister, I would assume only 15 yrs old, who had come to pick her up from the shelter. As she left, I finally understood what Israel is defending and how important this operation was.

Soon after my little friend left, the six of us left the bomb shelter too. As we were having a discussion above ground, the alarm went off that a ketusha rocket was coming our way. We immediately dropped everything and ran to the shelter downstairs. People from the street also joined us as we calmly made our way to that underground lair. I don't really know what I was thinking at that time. Was I scared? Maybe a little but I was thinking more along the lines of did I get down there in 30 seconds (that's how long you have in Ashkelon). In less than five minutes we were cleared to go back upstairs and resume our meeting. Then we left Ashkelon. Of course I texted my mom as soon as I got out of missile range (that was the only way my mom would let me go). When I got back to Jerusalem I had time to think more about what I just experienced. I just spent the day in a bomb shelter with 50-60 kids who spend 8-12 hours a day, every day for the past 3 weeks, 8 YEARS for those in Sderot. I can only imagine how hard of a life it is for these kids who rarely spend time outside on the playground in the sunlight. To not have the luxury of a sunny day is incomprehensible. And then I thought about the parents who must be thinking about where their kids are every time that alarm goes off, several times a day. Is that any way to live? After that experience I completely and utterly agree with Israel's position. No one should ever be allowed to live like that, it's inhumane! What frustrates me the most is all the people who are protesting against Israel about human rights violations. Where have these same people been the past 8 YEARS Sderot has been bombed? I am now under the perceptive that the only way for one to understand what is going on is to experience what is happening. No one can actually say that Israel is not justified in its actions if they are living comfortably in America instead of in a bomb shelter in Ashkelon. All those kids there deserve and require our understanding and respect. I wish there was more I could do for them. They are such special people, everyone residing in those southern cities. They go on living, through all of this terror. And that deserves our admiration.